Ministry is a busy, exhausting vocation physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.
My motor runs pretty fast, and while I am awake, I am moving, thinking, studying, praying.
Monday night we enjoyed a very good consistory meeting. I got home at 10:30, still buzzing. Julie and I stayed up until close to midnight. It is not possible for me to "sleep in." Rather it is, but sleeping in for me means waking up at 6:45 a.m.
There is a persistent threat of pride in a strong work ethic. A strong work ethic does not necessarily, but often accompanies a dismissive attitude regarding sleep. The thoughts goes like this: "I am a machine. I don't need sleep." (Yes, I've thought this.) Another way of saying this is, "Mortals need sleep. I am no mere mortal. I am a god." And then we work like a dog to fulfill this credo.
I need sleep.
My body breaks down after just one night of insufficient or poor sleep. I feel it for a day or two. Several nights of insufficient sleep lead to emotional and mental breakdowns. A sustained pattern of insufficient sleep ultimately leads to spiritual breakdown. We are mortal. We were designed to work and to rest. To be active and to sleep. Most five year olds can figure this out. It is a bit harder with me.
I am tired today. Following my late Monday night (which was preceded by a very early morning), a busy "day off" yesterday, and an already busy today (swim at 5, meeting at 6:30, etc.), I am dreadfully tired.
That is all.
No comments:
Post a Comment